By Donald
B. Ardell - June 28, 2009
“If we
read in the annals of China that several thousand years ago, five thousand
people were fed on one sandwich, and that several sandwiches were left over
after the feast, there are few intelligent men who would credit the statement.
But many intelligent people, reading a like story in Hebrew, or in Greek, or in
a mistranslation from either of those languages, accept the story without a
doubt.”
Robert G.
Ingersoll, Myth and Miracle, 1885
If we
today exhibit the same skepticism toward news out of China as Ingersoll
credited to the men and women of his time regarding a certain miracle account,
we will readily dismiss a news item about China concerning gender
imbalance. However, unlike the
mind-boggling claims for multiplying fish sandwiches from Hebrew and Greek sources, the tale I’m about to
reveal is quite demonstrably true. After all, it appeared not as an urban
legend e-mail, but as a front-page story in the Wall Street Journal! (See Mei Fong, "It's Cold Cash,
Not Cold Feet, Motivating Runaway Brides in China," Wall Street Journal,
June 5, 2009, A1.)
Here is
the basic story. According to Mr.
Fong, an Asian sector reporter for the WSJ, there are 32 million more males
under the age of 20 in China than females. A large number are in or near marrying age. The guys are looking around and finding
slim pickings. The figures
reported are based upon the 2005 China census, and were published in the May
edition of the British Journal of Medicine. What this means is that a horny young male surplus
approximately the size of Canada's entire population is getting mighty
restless, and cold showers can only go so far in relieving tensions, if you get
my drift. These people are
thinking about their future and their families are adding to the pressure by
asking questions, such as “Why don’t you find yourself a mate? Are you planning on living at home
forever?”
In short,
a gender crisis, due to the country’s Draconian 30-year one-child policy, has
created a serious problem, one that adds to the nation’s many other
problems. (These include but are
not limited to an impending nationwide water shortage, high unemployment due to
mass migrations from rural to urban centers, poor grain production, wide income
gaps, excessive energy consumption, wasting of natural resources and
environmental pollution – plus the fact that the government remains a
totalitarian dictatorship blocking personal freedoms and abusing human
rights.) The population control
policy, combined with the fact that cultural norms in China highly valued male
babies, created the disastrous social perturbation now tormenting young Chinese
males.
So, what
is China to do?
Before
offering my gay agenda solution, I should mention that a new profession has
opened up for ethically-challenged young women – that of bride for a week
or so. It seems that the
traditional dowry paid by the groom’s family has skyrocketed in value. The
going rate for a bride is now about $5,500 – that’s 38,000 yuan, enough
to lure cartels of bride traders into existence to prey on the smitten husband
marks.
The
solution is to go around the predatory females. This is simple enough if the Chinese are willing to overcome
their prejudice against homosexuality. All they have to do is embrace what the Family Research Council in this
country has called “the hidden gay agenda” since 1992. Others, such as U.S. Supreme Court
Justice Antonin Scalia (in a dissent in “Lawrence v. Texas”), call this
nefarious conspiracy simply as “the homosexual agenda.” Either way or some other way (term),
this entails (among other things) “eliminating the moral opprobrium
traditionally associated with homosexual conduct.” Well, I’m all in favor of that – who needs opprobrium
associated with anything involving people engaging in whatever it is they want
to engage in that is no business of others, and that affects none other? That seems like a good thing to
me. If the Chinese males can find
happiness among themselves without any of that opprobrium nastiness following
them around, well, who could object? Does China have a population of Jerry Falwell/Pat Robertson/James
Dobson/Rick Warren troglodyte types?
Other
goals that our own Christian Right attributes to this nefarious agenda are
universal acceptance of the gay lifestyle, discrediting of scriptures that condemn homosexuality, muzzling of the clergy and Christian media,
indoctrinating children and future generations through public education and
securing all the legal benefits of marriage for any two or more people who
claim to have homosexual tendencies. I think all of these agenda items are highly desirable. Don’t Christian and other sectarian
schools indoctrinate children? If
the gays want to have a go at trying to do what religions have always and
continue to do, well, that seems fair enough. I certainly favor an agenda, gay or otherwise, in this
country, China and elsewhere, that seeks to promote acceptance of any lifestyle
one chooses – that’s the kind of thing you expect in a free society. I definitely favor discrediting of scriptures that condemn homosexuality and I would love to muzzle violations of
church/state separation by the clergy and Christian media. Finally, I want everyone to have the
kind of equal rights that are enshrined in our own Constitution, including the
young males (and those two-timing, absconding young females) in China.
These
supposed scary aspects of the boogeyman “gay agenda” sound pretty good to me,
and I’m not even gay, not that there’s anything wrong with that, as we learned
watching Seinfeld a few years ago.
So, my
Well Infidel recommendation to Chinese youth: Consider switching teams. After a while, those inflated dowries will come down in cost
and the brides may decide to stick around, if there are any young Chinese males
still interested in them.
Be well.
Don Ardell
is the Well Infidel. He favors
evidence over faith, reason over revelation and meaning and purpose over
spirituality. His enthusiasm for
reason, exuberance and liberty are reflected in his books (14), newsletter (490
editions of a weekly report) and lectures across North America and a dozen
other countries. He is very old
(over 40) but very fast (national and world triathlon champion). 